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Dallas – Recap & Review – Lifting The Veil

photo: tnt
photo: tnt
Lifting The Veil

Original Air Date: Mar 17, 2014

Karen Belgrad – Managing Editor

What is proper etiquette when one marries their former cousin-in-law? Do the rules change when the couple is already married and just doing a vow renewal? Given that the length of the marriage is best measured by and egg time, do you even bring a gift?

Now, add to that the fact the groom is diddling his step-cousin and working on his wedding day, and I think Miss Manners is stroking out just about now. Throw in a drunk and angry mother of the groom and you have quite the wedding day. Or, as our luck would have it, an episode of Dallas!

Before we get into the specs of John Ross’s and Pamela’s wedding day, let’s cover the Nicolas Treviño storyline. In Mexico, Christopher learned that not only was Nicolas an orphan who changed his name, but also that he is married to Lucia. He doesn’t see Drew lurking around the corner, but outside of a call to Nicolas, expressing his remorse over the bombing and giving a little exposition, Drew is just as (un) important as he’s always been.

Christopher is quick to tell Elena about Nicolas’s wife, but Elena asserts the two are divorced. Nicolas admits to her that they’re still married in the eyes of the church, but claims not in the eyes of God. Now, I don’t know much about Catholicism, but I’m pretty sure that God and Church share the same eyes. What it all comes down to is that Nicolas is still legally married, but he insists his heart belongs to Elena. At hour’s end, Lucia shows up in Dallas and blackmails Nicolas into staying married, so while the divorcing story wasn’t a lie, it doesn’t bode well for his burgeoning relationship with Elena.

Before the wedding, John Ross gets a call to meet with the railroad commissioner about the Lesser Prairie Chicken investigation. Pamela is bothered that he’s taking a meeting before their wedding, but John Ross insists he’ll be back in time. On his way out, he lays into Emma for her negligee duplicity, basically crushing her feelings. To his surprise, his meeting turns out to be with Harris, who promises to help with the railroad commissioner in exchange for the files that Emma stole. John Ross offers one file, and Harris requests an orange flash drive. John Ross calls Emma for it, but she plays games with him, at first not showing up with the drive, wanting an apology for his earlier treatment and to clearly make him late for the wedding.

John Ross meets up with Harris without the drive and surprisingly, at a brothel. Harris shows with the commissioner getting kinky with a woman in a dog suit. Sadly, thanks to Jerry Springer, I know this fetish is called plushies or furries. Thank you Jerry. John Ross blackmails the commissioner and has Bum intercept Emma with the hard drive and bring it to the brothel. While they wait, Harris arranges for some working girls to pleasure John Ross and he humorously rebuffs their advances. Of course, it’s all a set-up, as one of the girls is sixteen, Harris has photos, and plans to get a “sample” of John Ross on her dress courtesy of his secretary. Got all that? Oh, and Judith Ryland is the madam at the brothel. Gotta love the Ryland family!

Back at Southfork, Sue Ellen tells Ann about the affair and insists Emma move out of Southfork. Because, yes, the woman who doesn’t live there gets to decide which grown child moves out? Ann, with knowledge of Harris’s double dealings against the cartel, insists she’ll come up with another plan. Meanwhile, Pamela begins to worry about her groom’s whereabouts. Of course, it doesn’t help that her mother Afton is there to make snide remarks and push all of Sue Ellen’s buttons.

John Ross does finally appear and Sue Ellen confronts him about his affair and being just like his daddy. He in turn, just like his daddy, calls her out for having booze on her breath. He tells her that he loves Pamela and Emma is just business, which only serves to repulse his mother. He points out that she has looked the other way her whole life, so why stop now?

He makes his way to an infuriated Pamela and promises, after a swift slap upside the head from Afton, that he’s doing everything so she can have all she’s ever wanted. Pamela’s heard those words before, from Cliff, so she less than swayed. But John Ross uses his magic charm, and we soon see Pamela walking down the aisle, given away by Bobby… her former father-in-law. And despite the second time around jokes from Lucy, Ray, and Christopher, the wedding does indeed happen.

John Ross celebrates his nuptials by bragging to Bobby that his chicken deal is dead and fracking (DRINK) will happen at Southfork. Bobby vows to stop him, but confesses to Sue Ellen that he has no cards left to play. Sue Ellen offers to help him stop John Ross.

We end with everyone, John Ross/Pamela, Elena/Nicolas, and new pairing Christopher/Heather (the ranch hand) getting it on while poor Emma cries alone.

And there you have my TwoCents! Share your TwoCents, comments, and feedback below!

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