The Vampire Diaries
The Dinner Party
Original Air Date: Feb 16, 2011
Meg – Staff Writer
It’s a problem all couples have. You meet a girl, you fall in love – you have the dinner date, the movie date, but—which is the date where you tell her you kinda sorta ate her family?
Mystic Falls – 1860s
Elena is still reading through Jonathan Gilbert’s journals, which means we’re headed to… Flashback Town!
Jonathan, his brother Thomas, and a woman are having dinner. I’m too distracted by the apparent fact that this woman seems to be named “gonorrhea” to pay too much attention. I can’t possibly have heard that right…
Concerned by noises outside, Jonathan and his brother go investigate. Jonathan uses his magical vampire compass to prove to Thomas that there are no vampires nearby. Except for the vampire that pops over and drops Thomas (too bad – he was cute. He also seemed to be defending himself with a butter knife, so… maybe this is for the best). Gonorrhea runs outside and screams before getting cut down herself.
Jonathan writes: “I saw the vampire who killed me. It was Stefan Salvatore.” Okay, did he wait until you went back in the house, grabbed your diary and pause for a “feelings moment” before he killed you? Because otherwise, Jonathan Gilbert has redefined ghostwriter.
Stefan and Elena are still feuding over Elena’s unwavering determination to orchestrate her own doom. She’s additionally upset because she’s learning all sorts of fun new facts from the Gilbert diaries—like how Stefan apparently killed them all. Oops.
Stefan admits that he used to be a monster; but then he makes broody puppy eyes of contrition, so Elena can’t help but forgive him. She says that Jonathan Gilbert just got crazier and crazier over the years, “I guess that’s what happens when you spend your life obsessed with vampires.” (no comment).
The journal talks about the dagger forged by witches that Damon is going to use to kill Elijah. Unfortunately, the journal also says that the dagger “It must be wielded by humans and will bring death to any demon who wields it.” Double Oops.
Bonnie and Jeremy
After their kiss last week, Jer-Bear is one smitten kitten. He gets adorably overprotective when Luka shows up to yell at Bonnie for magically roofie-ing (is that a verb?) him last week.
Jeremy invites Bonnie over to, uh… practice some magic. She’s thinking literally. He’s thinking figuratively. When Bonnie shows up, she’s a bit overwhelmed to see that Jeremy has set up a fire hazard o’ love candles. He’s like this bizarre fusion of emo-meets-Pepe le Pew.
Bonnie tells him that she wants to clear it with Elena before things go farther. I think that’s fair, but I also think that sometimes it’s easier to ask for forgiveness than permission.
Bonnie practices channeling fire and just generally impressing Jeremy. He asks her to try channeling him—noting that his body is mostly water and that she should channel his body water. There is no way to type that without sounding so wrong.
Before Jer can channel Bonnie to the boudoir, their date night is interrupted by Hot Doctor Father (HDF!). He storms into the house, throws Jeremy against a wall and demands that Bonnie fess up. She tell him she knows that his daughter is being held by Klaus. Saying “this is for your own good,” HDF grabs Bonnie’s head and starts chanting.
HDF storms out of the house, but is at least courteous enough to magically close the door behind him. He leaves Bonnie bawling on the ground. She’s upset that HDF “took her power,” but really I think she should just be thankful she’s not a highlander. That power transfer would have ended much more terribly (there can only be one!).
Interview with the Vampire
Stefan recounts to Elena how he was a terrible monster. He says he relished being a vampire, but that it took him “to the darkest place it could.” Based on the flashback setting, I’m thinking it’s the set of Pride and Prejudice (sans Colin Firth, sadly). Seriously—some frilly lady plays piano, while another one dances. Stefan drinks from some well-frocked waif on a chaise lounge. It’s a wee bit campy. I also think it’s hilarious that Stefan has a troupe of comely young maidens at his beck and call and nobody is naked. C’mon CW—you’ve to keep up with HBO somehow!
Killjoy Damon with, replete with his sexy olde timey hair, shows up to ruin the party. He compels the gals to “leave this place and never think of it again.” Hm, maybe if he really wanted to avoid suspicion he should have brought some moist toilettes for their gaping neck wounds.
Stefan starts feeding on icky gangrenous Civil War soldiers. Gross. One night he meets Alexia Branson (or, Lexi, to those of us who remember her from Season 1). Lexi needs a place to stay so she shows up at his mansion—although she’s not impressed with his décor choices (aka rooms full of dead blood-drained waifs strewn about the furniture). She resolves to help him manage his urges. Women do love a project.
As Damon leaves, he asks Lexi to take care of Stefan. She agrees and unfortunately forgets to ask him not to kill her in 160-something years.
Damon’s Got a Plan
Damon is determined to kill Elijah. He wants to verify that the knife he has will actually kill an original vampire, so he goes to talk to Katherine, the one person that has reliably never ever told him the truth. Oh, Damon. You’re lucky you’re so pretty.
Katherine is still trapped in the tomb – desiccated and rather nasty looking, to be honest. Apparently Damon agrees, as he arrives with both some courtesy blood to revive her, as well as some new wardrobe items. I really wish they’d shown us the scene where Damon stopped into Forever 21.
Katherine begs Damon not to kill Elijah, saying that if Elijah dies, she’ll be trapped in the tomb forever. I don’t believe her for a second.
Damon throws s dinner party, with Jenna, Elijah, Andie, Ric, and John (who crashes). Before entering, Elijah sets some ground rules: “if you so much as you make a move to cross me, I’ll kill you and I’ll kill everyone In this house.”
Before Damon has the chance to stab Elijah, Stefan calls Alaric and tells him that the knife will kill any demon (or Damon) that wields it. With Jenna conveniently in the kitchen, Alaric spears Elijah through the back with the magical dagger. So much for dessert.
Elijah grows veiny and croaks (no!). Damon and Ric drag his body to the cellar. Ric is furious that he had to kill someone with Jenna in the next room. Ric is really mad at Damon for trying to kill Elijah without telling him. Ric claims it’s all about wanting to protect Jenna, but I think he’s upset because Damon lied to him and he feels hurt. To mend their bro-ship, Damon agrees to no more lies. Awww. I love these two together.
They peace out of the cellar, leaving Elijah’s body (shouldn’t they burn that?). Unfortunately, they didn’t realize that originals only stay dead for as long as the magical knife is stuck inside them. Oh noes!
Meanwhile, Jenna is can’t shake the feeling that Ric is lying to her. She asks him what happened to his first wife. Poor Ric honestly just doesn’t know what to say—I can’t really blame him. How does anyone say, “oh, well… she was vampirized by your niece’s boyfriend’s brother,” really?
Lurking around the corner, John taunts Ric and again demands that he return his anti-vamp ring. Tired of fighting, Ric hands over the ring and tells John that he’s really going to need it because Damon is going to kill him.
Elijah races to the cabin where Elena and Stefan are staying. Although he is stealthy and suitably menacing, Stefan is tipped off by the soundtrack.
Elena meets Elijah at the door, but (wisely) doesn’t invite him in. Elijah says that he is a very patient man and he’s more than content to just wait her out. Is that better or worse than huffing and puffing?
Elena wants to renegotiate her deal, but Elijah isn’t having any of it. Elena pulls out a knife and threatens to kill herself, saying that Elijah will never be able to get Klaus to come to Mystic Falls if all he has to offer is dead doppelganger bait.
Elijah counters that Stefan would never let her kill herself. Elena responds that she knows and that as soon s Stefan revives her, she’ll kill herself and become a vampire. Just like Katherine.
When he tries to call her bluff, Elena stabs herself in the stomach. Eek! Elijah freaks out and begs for her to let him heal her. As soon as he’s close enough, she stabs him with the magical dagger. I’m… confused. Was the stabbing part really necessary?
Later, Damon returns to his room to find, surprise surprise, a very naked Katherine in his shower. She claims that she wants to help Team Kill Klaus. Should he trust her? Do you?
I enjoy Katherine for her saucy bad-assery, but I’m not sure they needed to bring her out of the tomb just yet. I don’t want us to be oversaturated. While I’m sad to see Elijah bow out for now, but relieved that can still come back in the future. What did you think of the episode? Leave some comments and let me know your two cents!